New Neighbors
by tasty cheez
Summary: COMPLETE. Johnny meets a human who isn't an A hole. Naota meets a very skinny weird guy. JtHM FLCL crossover. No pairings. Please R&R. even if you hate it.
1. they meet

**A/N**** Alright time to completely redo this story. Its a good idea but my first attempt at it was crap, but I shall never give up!! neevvvvaaaaaaaaaaaaa! regains composer woot.**

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Johnny was laying in bed starring at the ceiling. He wasn't trying to go to sleep, oh no our Johnny would never do such a thing. He was wondering where his voices had gone. He hadn't heard a peep out of any of them in days.

"Maybe they died... can figments die... were they ever alive... am I alive... gasp what if I'm just someones figment, the product of someones warped imagination... I want a brain freezy."

Alright he _was_ thinking about his figments.

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Naota, as it turns out, was similarly laying on his futon staring at the ceiling. There were some differences though. Number one Naota was trying to go to sleep; number two he wasn't thinking about voices in his head (he didn't have any). Instead while Naota tried, and failed, to go to sleep he started thinking about his past.

"God I messed everything up. But its not like it was all my fault. Haruko is the one who got me into that mess, and if my brother wouldn't have gone to play baseball Mamimi wouldn't of always drug me down to the river. If I hadn't been at the river I never would have run into Haruko. That works I'll blame my brother."

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As Johnny left his home and wandered off in the direction of his favorite treat- and most abundant source of nourishment- he came upon two Asian kids probably around the age of eight-teen or so. One of them glanced over his shoulder and saw Johnny. He quickly looked toward his friend while pointing a thumb at the homicidal maniac. The second Asian looked back and started laughing with his friend.

Johnny quickened his pace hands in pockets and walked right between the two. as soon as he got passed them he pulled his hands out of his pockets revealing to smiley-faced knives. He lunged them backwards through the hearts of the two youths who fell silently to the ground.

"Damn whats all the Asians this week. It's like they just want to die." It isn't racism if all the Asians really are being dicks.

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Naota had finally got to sleep but it was pretty useless. His alarm went off five minutes later.

"Fuck." Said Naota in a good morning world, go die, kind of voice .

Naota got up from his futon and got dressed. Luckily for him he didn't need to get all fancy and perky for his job. He worked at a guitar/music store. It was a laid back environment. As he started out the door he decided he might as well grab his bass. It's not like he couldn't find something to play at the store, but not one of the interments would have the same tone as his. His was special. His was a Rickenbacker M001 Bass from the early sixties, and it was heavily modified. It had a hollow neck especially designed to shoot bullets at unsuspecting victims and a chainsaw motor in the body that gave it a very interesting resonance.

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After a long day at work Naota walked home and came across the man he had just moved near, Johnny. Johnny saw Naota approach and was on guard, ready for Naota to say some smart-ass remark and give Johnny a reason to cut his throat. Naota didn't say some smart-ass remark. Instead he said "Hey."

Johnny wasn't expecting this. and just walked on by with a puzzled look on his face.

Similar exchanges between the two happened every couple of days. After about a month Johnny had enough of Naota not being a dick. They started to approach each other walking down the road. Naota nodded his head in greeting, but Johnny wasn't going to take that.

He stopped dead in his tracks and said "Hey. Your not a dick. Why aren't you a dick?"

"Uhh... what?"

"YOU. You're not an asshole like everybody else. Whats your deal?!"

"Why would I be a dick or an asshole or something like that?"

"Because your a human, and all humans are assholes. Especially Asians lately."

"Isn't that kind of racist?"

"Not if its true."

"I'm going to get a brain freezy. You want one?" said Naota trying to change the subject.

Johnny thought a while. _This man is human, but he isn't like the others. I must get to know him better and find out why he isn't a dick._

"Sure."

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**Well thats the end of the first chapter. I think It's way better than the old version. Please tell me what you think. I plan on writing more on this story making maybe three more chapters. Maybe more maybe less. BYE.**


	2. somebodys got some issues

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A/N Alright here comes chapter 2. NOW TAKE IT! TAKE IT IN THE BUTT LIKE A MAN!! I'm really sorry about that. That kind of stuff just pops out every so often, don't take offense. I'd like to thank Mugiwara Gorillaz for proving that he wanted me to update. please R&R.

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Naota and Johnny arrived at the 24/7 after a long silent awkward walk. They entered the store and went to the Brain Freezy machine. Johnny got cherry and Naota got a poop (like the IZ soda. Just clarifying) flavored one. Johnny looked at Naota in complete disgust.

"How can you get the soda flavored one. Cherry is better by far."

"Yeah, I agree but, I always get the cherry kind and it's good to have a little change in your life. Even if it's not for the best."

Johnny just sucked on his brain freezy with a very philosophical look on his face as they walked over and paid for their drinks. They left the establishment and Johnny realized he didn't understand where Naota was coming from.

"Hey... umm, what did you say your name was again?

"I didn't, but my name is Naota."

"Oh, I'm Johnny but you can call me Nny for short."

"Knee, like your knee?"

"NO! FUCK! ITS NOT THAT FUCKING HARD TO UNDERSTAND!... uhh... I mean no. like John-_Nny_." Nervous laughter.

"O...K... What was your question?"

"Hmm? Oh, right, how could change be for the better even if it makes you worse off?"

"I spent the first twelve years of my life in a stagnant drowning pool of the mundane and ordinary. Then Haruko came and turned my life into a living hell. She made my room a mess, she hit me with her guitar, she got me into fights, she almost killed my father, she ran me over..." five minutes later "... and she broke my nose with a baseball. She stayed with me for one year, and when she left my life went back to normal, back to that stagnant pool of unchanging nothingness. Thats when I realized I would rather be in hell then in Mabase, my home town, because at least hell is interesting."

"I think somebody's got some issiuuuuuuuuse." Said Johnny in a sing-songy voice.

"You don't know half of it. That girl, Haruko, she's really an alien that was seeking an astro-fiend. She used me to get to him. I fell in love with her even though I knew what she was up to. Hell I sided with her even though the earth would probably get destroyed if I did, and the reason the earth would of gotten destroyed was because a **giant fucking robot** popped out of my head and attacked the city, I don't know how many people died that day, they might have got stepped on, shot, squished, but it all turned out fine because the first robot to blast from my skull ate me wich allowed him to channal energy some-fucking-how from a giant bird dude and he stopped the robot. Then she got me to fix the robot and that almost destroyed the planet." There was a long pause before Naota added... "And now I think I'm suffering from insaomnia."

"Told you somebody had isues." Naota and Johnny had a little laugh at this.

"We should meet up again sometime."

"Sure."

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And so they did. Naota and Johnny went to get some coffee that friday and they spoke of stuff; stuff they liked; stuff they didn't like; stuff they thought about; and what not but, I'm way to lazy to write that scene out so I'll just end the chapter here.

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A/N woot updates. please review especially if it you read it. or I'll fuckin' kill ya and everyone you've ever loved... ever. 


	3. Poop scooper

A/N holy crap have I actually been consistently updating three chapters in a row. I'm proud of myse- CRAP!!! I totally forgot to do my math homework. Damn. I own nothing but imagine if I did.

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Naota was once again in a very familiar position. He couldn't sleep, and most importantly couldn't stop thinking. All he had been able to do for the past couple of weeks was think about his home town of Mabase. He thought about when the gun toting hand blew out of his skull. How many people had died that day? How many homes were destroyed by stray rounds? The cost of that day in life and money must have been a staggering amount.

'But wait...' Thought Naota 'what if it was just their time to go? What if God decided that their time on this planet was over? Does that make me a tool of God? If there is a god than he is infallible. If he is infallible then he wouldn't let stuff like people die unless it was supposed to. If there is not a god than there is no after life and those people probably don't care that they're dead. So if I kill someone then its they're time to die or, it doesn't matter if they die. Unless of course they were to eventually do something great for humankind. So if someone unimportant dies it's OK but if someone important dies it's bad. Wait! if god does exist he wouldn't let someone important die. Well I guess that just lowers the odds of killing someone important.'

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It had been about a month since Naota had gone with Johnny to get that brain freezy. The two have become very close friends and Johnny even tried to introduce Naota to Squee. He failed though as Squee was gone the night they broke into his room.

FLASHBACKFLASHBACKFLASHBACKFLASHBACKFLASHBACKFLASHBACKFLASHBACK

"Umm... are you sure we can just go in through his window like this?" asked Naota afraid of being arrested for breaking and entering and other such crimes.

"Yes I'm sure, me and lil' Squeegee have fun talks all the time?"

"That sounded pretty creepy." Naota said with a grin on his face.

"Yes, it did, didn't it?"

As the two entered the youths room they noticed that he wasn't home. Sitting on his pillow was a note that read as follows:

"Dear scary neighbor man, I'm on vacation so don't come over here for a while all the other rooms in the house have sensors that will alert the police of robbers.

Todd"

"Well that sucks." Said Naota who had originally picked up the letter.

"Damn, you would like Squee."

ENDOFFLASHBACKENDOFFLASHBACKENDOFFLASHBACKENDOFFLASHBACK

Beep beep beep beep BAM beep BAM beep BAM beep. "**Why the fuck won't you turn off you little bastard!!!**" Naota seemed to be having problems turning off his alarm and was currently bashing the top of it with his fist. "**Fuck you!!!!**" He grabbed the alarm clock and ripped it out of the wall, it kept beeping. "Batteries huh, well how do your batteries like this." He then threw the damnable thing down at the floor, grabbed his bass and used it to break the clock into _very_ tiny pieces. "Son of a bitch." Naota went to work that day without doing any of the normal morning things people do like changing close, bathing, etc.

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When Naota was on his break he walked back behind the store to smoke a joint with a fellow co-worker. His name was Dennis but everyone called him Steve and nobody knew why. "Here ya go Nao." said Steve handing Naota what was left of the joint. "I think I heard that stupid ringy bell thing that goes off when someone comes in."

"Thanks man." As Naota was finishing the last of the joint he saw Johnny on the street. He was following some guy that Naota had seen in the store before. He bought various guitar accessories every so often. He played bass for a band that was starting to get kind of big around the area. He was kind of a dick but the rest of the band was pretty cool. As Naota was thinking all this he saw Johnny pull a dagger out of his pocket and stab the man in the side of the neck, then he twisted it and pushed it through his throat sideways.

Johnny just walked on by like nothing happened. Naota put his joint out on the wall and went inside. He had had enough pot for today.

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Johnny and Naota were walking to the 24/7 to get a brain freezy later that day.

"Did you kill a guy today while you were downtown?" Asked Naota in a 'just to make small talk' kind of voice.

"Yeah, he made fun of my boots."

"Ya do that often."

"Yup."

"Why?

"Well ya see, they're assholes. All they do is make the earth a more shity place to live so I..." Johnny fumbled for the right words "...You know the guy in parades following the horse around with a shovel? I'm kinda like that guy. Plus its fun."

"So your the poop scooper of justice." Naota had an amused look on his face which probably had something to do with the picture he had in his head of Johnny in a super hero out fit, cape blowing in the wind, holding a dookie infested shovel, heroic pose.

"I don't know if I'd use those words but ya, Kind of."

"So you just kill random people on the street?"

"I usually take them into my basement."

"Call me next time you do that OK? I want to be 'the dude holding the bucket.'"

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A/N Yay I did it. Sorry there isn't that much Johnny in this I'll try and put more of him in later chapters. I'm also going to try to bring in Squee.The next chapter will probably contain graphic violence so yeah watch out for that. Please review. I'm a whore for them. Me love them long time. 


	4. nightmare

A/N I hope this chapter isn't confusing. READ AND REVIEW

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Naota and Johnny were standing in the middle of Johnny's dank, dark, basement. Blood was splattered all over one of the walls creating a very interesting image. If you looked at it at just the right angle it kind of looked like a frowning face. The other three walls were completely clean, well they weren't clean - they were actually pretty dirty – but there wasn't any blood on them. At the bottom of the gore wall there was a body. You couldn't really tell anymore but the body belonged to a young women probably in high-school. The body was completely destroyed, cuts from Johnny's smiley knives were all over her slender form, her right leg was blown off at the knee – apparently Naota had fond some uses for the gun in his bass -, and a couple of ribs were broken where she had been struck by Naota. Her head was completely caved in from Johnny's steel toed boots.

Naota and Johnny both headed up the stairs to go watch T.V. Naota's vision was starting to fade. A dark ring was blanking out his peripheral vision. He was dizzy. He tried his best to keep standing, to shrug it off. He passed out at the top of the stairs.

DREAMSEQUENCEDREAMSEQUENCEDREAMSEQUENCEDREAMSEQUENCE

'Son of a bitch, my head. Huh, where the fuck am I?' Naota wondered as his body got up off the ground. As he go up he noticed his hand. 'Am I really that pale?'

Naota started walking around. The funny thing was he didn't have control of where he was going, all he could do was wait and watch. His head turned toward a shop window and he saw 'his' reflection. 'Nny!? Oh my god why is Nny- I'm in Nny's head! What's going on!?'

Johnny spun around trying to figure out where he was. "Shinden High School?" The school seemed pretty ordinary to Johnny, but to Naota it seemed very familiar.

'I can't put my finger on it... Mamimi!' just as he thought that the red headed pyro burst from the front of the school she was crying and ran directly into Johnny.

"Watch where your going!" The girl screamed at Johnny.

"Hey just because your sad doesn't give you the right to be a bitch!"

"My fucking boyfriend is leaving the country tomorrow! I'll be a bitch if I fucking want!"

"I was afraid you say something along those lines." Naota was mentally screaming 'No Nny don't do it don't you fucking touch here I'll fucking kill you!' Nny took two long smiley knives from his pocket and ran them straight through one of the few people Naota had cared about back in his home town. Mamimi fell to the ground her red blood mixing beautifully with her red hair.

"Where to go, where to go." Thought Johnny. 'I'll fucking kill you you god damn ass hole!' Thought Naota.

Johnny continued walking around town until he found a man sitting underneath a bridge.

'Tasuku' It was Naota's brother. To Johnny it was just another guy in the perfect position.

"Oh, no way I've always wanted to try this." He then ran onto the bridge wielding his two knives. Then he jumped off coming straight down on Naota's brother slicing him clean in two. 'Why Nny! Why are you killing all those that I loved!'

The blood shed continued though the town of Mabase. Naota's father dead. Grandfather dead. The cat was used to kill his grandfather. His teacher was dead. His friends Masashi and Gaku were dead Gaku suffered an exceptionally horrible death. The whole time Naota could do nothing but sit and watch as his whole life was taken from him. Everyone he had ever known or loved killed at the hand of his closest friend.

Naota had thought that the worst was over. Then he saw Ninamori. His love. The one he'd always loved, even when he didn't know it. She wasn't like the others she was smart, beautiful, and at the same time so average and down to earth it was amazing. She loved Naota, and Naota loved her.

Johnny approached her. "I don't think I need a reason to kill you." thats when Naota realized something was different about her. She had a look in her eyes. He had seen it before but where.

Ninamori Just looked at Johnny, the man who had just announced that he was going to kill her , and laughed. "I would really like to watch you try."

Johnny rushed her and she just stood there. Suddenly her forehead quivered and a horn popped out. the horn grew and grew until it burst and out popped Haruko on her vespa 'Haruko!' naota was amazed to see his old house keeper. This woman had caused him so much pain, but in an odd way he loved her just as much as Ninamori.

Johnny wasn't disturbed at all by what he saw. He jumped up and sliced her head off with one swing. The world went into slow motion as Johnny sailed through the air. Ninamori's eyes stared deep into Johnny's. Her eyes had a single message and it Naota deeper that any blade. 'Why Naota?' Johnny's blades dug deep int her chest. She just stood their staring into Johnny/Naota's eyes. She then fell silently to the ground. What was left of Naota's soul was gone now.

EMDOFDREAMSEQUNCEEMDOFDREAMSEQUNCEEMDOFDREAMSEQUNCE

The next morning Naota awoke with Johnny staring at him from above. "Have a nice nap?"

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A/N Hope you like it please review. I Love You. 


	5. the end

A/N this is the final chapter. I'm done with this story. This is the end my friends. If you ask me to continue this story I say "Noooooo didn't you read the Author Note you swine!!!" woot

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After Naota's hellish nightmare he lost his mind. No his mind was intact – compared to before the dream – it was his soul that he lost. The few things in life that he used to enjoy were meaningless to him now. He didn't crack a smile or laugh. Even the things that used to make him mad had no effect. He was a zombie. He was cold.

Johnny started to notice the difference in Naota. He realized that the man he once knew no longer existed. Naota was cold and it made Johnny jealous.

One night Johnny and Naota were just sitting around in Johnny's living room. Naota just sat their unmoving, unfeeling. Johnny glared at Naota. ' How dare he become cold!!! He did this just to make me realize how much I feel! I... want... to... be...COLD!!!'

Johnny stood up and headed for the door.

"Where ya' headed" He said this with such un-interest that it drove Johnny mad(er).

"I'm going to go fuck that alien bitch of yours right in the fucking ass!!!" Johnny yelled trying t get a rise out of Naota, but Naota just sat there unmoved.

"Be back soon, you don't want to miss the crazy monkey show." Such emptiness in his voice Johnny knew he was mocking him. Johnny pulled out his knife and stuck Naota to the couch with it.

"Why do you fucking taunt me. You have the one thing that I desire and you wave it in front of me like I'm a fucking starving dog with no bone! You know I think I'm just going to kill you now an-" He was cut short by Naota who responded in a smooth monotone voice despite being stuck to a couch with a knife. "Well duh. It's kind of obvious your going to kill me. No need to state the obvious. Just kill me and save your speech for Mr. Samsa."

Johnny went crazy. His left eye twitched. He took out his second knife and stabbed Naota in the stomach. Naota just sat their watching his own violent death as if it were an infomercial. Johnny spun the knife a full 360 degrees. he just wanted a rise out of Naota before he died. Something, anything.

"Does it hurt! Does it!"

"In the end what difference does it make?

Johnny went to the kitchen and grabbed a lemon. He thought it would be appropriate to give him a last meal. He shoved the lemon into Naota's open stomach Then he stabbed away at the acid fruit. Naota just sat there staring blankly. He died after five more minutes of torture, but Johnny kept hacking away. Trying to get a rise out of the man. Pain is proof that your not dead yet. It is your brain's form of persuasion to keep you from doing things harmful to your health. Naota was dead inside, he felt no pain.

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A/N I fuckin' killed him. This is were my story ends. The last two chapters were sub par at best and this one isn't great. Any one who enjoyed my story thank you I'm glad you liked it but it's over now. I learned a lot from writing this story. I have so many little side plots to this story that I never got written down but Thats what one shots are for. I don't really like this ending. It feels to sudden and I know I just pissed off most if not all FLCL fans. Im really sorry about that. P.S my favorite quote from this story "His name was dennis, but every body called him steve, and nobody knew why." that makes me laugh every time. and I never laugh at my own jokes. Sorry again for killing like the entire cast of Fooly Cooly especially Naota. I didn't mean it don't hurt me. 


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